Back to the Regularly Scheduled Program...but Better!

Hello honeeyz!!!!

I miss you guys tremondously.  It's been 2 whole weeks since we last chatted and I so apologize for the delay.  This thing called life grabbed a hold of me and shook me nearly half to death over these past two weeks.  My goodness! I'll try my best to not allow that to happen again, or at least fight back and try to get a post or two in during the beating.  The reality is that I, like most Power Chicks, but unlike many successful celebrity bloggers, don't have the luxury of time to blog full-time without managing a "real" job that pays me so that I can pay all the bills, but Lord knows I'd love for that opportunity to grace me in the very near future.  Anyways, I've been balancing the Christmas holiday coming and going over the past few weeks, but I also have been working like a straight up crazy person....15hour days and nearly 70hours per week has been pretty typical for me. While it's looking like this grueling schedule will persist, I promise to do a better job of making sure you honeeyz and guys get your nutrients here at Milk and Honeeyz.  But there's some good news yet... although I haven't had the luxury to rant and rave on a daily basis, it has definitely been on my mind and in my head and I have several drafted posts, memos on my iPhone, notes scribbled on my notepad, points jotted in my iPad, and drafts via email in my inbox so I have enough material to get us back on track and keep us going! 

First up, it's only fitting to address the next impending event....New Years!  There are two things that come to mind immediately when I think of this holiday, Goals and Celebrating! However, It seems that some are trying to create a new trend (or at least I've seen it on Facebook quite often and it makes me smh and laugh every time), which is to denounce resolutions and say they are doing something better than that.  I'd love to know exactly what that is b/c any fool should know that walking around without goals, desires, plans, dreams, particularly unwritten, is why they are a fool instead of an accomplished and motivated individual.  I'm no fool so I happily set resolutions every year, most of which I keep and make a good faith effort in accomplishing.  Some fall by the wayside or get reworked in time but I always have a plan and I always go down my list checking things off and I always evaluate my progress before the end of the year.  There is nothing like starting a brand new year off with a brand new mind frame, regardless of how well or how poorly the preceeding year was.  If you put 20 progressive and beneficial things on your list but only half stick, you are 50% better off than you were last year rather than not b/c you were too busy pretending like you are above setting resolutions.  

More ranting and raving, a list of my goals for 2012 and pics from Christmas after the break>>>

You Better WORK It Honeey!! Casual Fridays

This past "Casual Friday." I incorporated a few of
some of the essential pieces I've previously discussed.
More importantly I was looking cute & professional!

Most employers have gotten with the program and implemented a Dress Down Friday, Casual Friday, Denim Friday or similar policy in the work force. I’m guessing this was done as an added incentive to get us to drag our butts into work on a Friday knowing full well we'd rather just call out sick. Well that’s what I’m assuming is the purpose of the policy, why else are you allowing me to come into work with my street clothes on?? Anyways, I actually enjoy dressing professional for work or the challenge of being presentable in a more formal environment while maintaining some of my style. First of all, I think it’s so much easier to throw on a dress or a pair of slacks with a button up shirt than it is to put together an entire outfit (I puts work into what I'm wearing!).  Second of all and most importantly, I went to school for 7 years; spent $100k on the cost of my higher education; and exhausted countless hours studying, while entertaining a crying baby (usually that was Cierra, as Brycen didn’t cry, he terrorized instead) and holding down my household so that I can finally get into the position where I had a respectable career that paid the bills (namely paid the student loan bill that paid for the cost of higher education..very circular situation that plagues the best of us) and would give me license to wear a professional little outfit.  After all that torture, expense and time, I often want to wear something that’s different than what I wear in my everyday life, if not for anything else but to distinguish the environment that I slaved away to get to versus the more relaxed social life that required little to nothing to play around in! But even still, a dress down day doesn't hurt nobody!! 

But there are a couple of rules to this.  Too often, you see people totally forgetting that while they have the green light to dress a little more relaxed for the day, totally blowing it and forgetting that they are still at work and there is a certain expectation.  It blows my mind when I see people prancing around at work looking like who done it and why? It is down right embarrassing so for the love of Christ, I've decided to put a list of DON'TS together so some people can stop making the same mistakes at work and thinking it's ok because it's Friday...um no boo boo; it's not ok!!!

DON'T:

1) Ripped jeans, bleached jeans, stained jeans, camel toe jeans, and the likes... I hope and pray no one is expecting me to explain why!!! Just don't do it. Please. When in doubt, women should try a dark washed trouser cut jean, any style including even a ankle/skinny black jean.  Men can go with any style jean provided they aren't the pair they wear when doing construction or painting around the house.  Add a blazer and a shoe and you are likely just as professional than someone with a pair of slacks on.  

2) Sweats.  Honestly, sweats outside of the gym is almost always a DON'T so to think it's ok to wear them to work is really outside of my comprehension.

3) Sneakers.  Again, it's work... not the park, not the gym, not the basketball court!!  You may want to be casual and relaxed and this can be done with a shoe.  For women there are great alternative shoes that give you comfort but style and professionalism, such as the cute little flats that everyone is wearing (not me, as my feet are allergic to flats and can only function in heels), wedges, riding boots (these, I will indulge even though they are generally flat...for some reason my feet has accepted these, I believe bc they are in trend now...yes, that's why), or wedges. I honestly pair the same shoes I wear with my business work attire with jeans.  The only shoe exception to dress down Friday is that  I can often wear a funkier shoe that I wouldn't normally wear with my business casual attire.  For men, also take a classic shoe you wear with slacks and suits and just pair them with your jeans.  There are also a lot of brands that make versatile shoes that can go from professional to casual usually with a rubber sole.  Some of my favorite labels for men that are notorious for a versatile shoe include Cole Haan, Prada, Gucci, Ralph Lauren and Puma Black Label.

4) Spandex.  Sighhhhhh.  I honestly see women in these way too regularly and unless you are really careful this is generally a recipe for disaster. You have to be very cautious of what you put on top to totally pull this off.  I would say err on the side of caution and just save it for another day.  There are some similar slim fitting pants that can work but it should be more of a pant than simply a pair of leggings.  Zara, Ralph Lauren, and a few other labels have some super cute riding pants that I have to have!!  You still get the whole legging effect but the material is usually thicker, there is usually added details of buttons, suede patches, piping, pockets, and/or stitching that help to separate this pant from the usual spandex legging.  

5) Baseball caps. Yes, people are literally showing up to work with baseball caps on and keeping them there as part of their outfit.  It's just inappropriate from beginning to end.  And when women do this (black women do this a lot in my building, unfortunately) it is beyond ridiculous b/c the natural conclusion is this fool has translated Casual Friday to mean Don't Do My Hair Friday and I can't even begin to tell you how absurd that is.  Do your darn hair everyday! Care about your appearance and the energy you are putting out there! Good Lord! 

MORE TIPS, PICS AND COMMENTARY (AKA RANTING) AFTER THE BREAK>>>

Holiday Cheer Without the Controversy!

Me and two of my besties and family
holiday party having a good old time!

With the impending Christmas holiday and the past Thanksgiving holiday, I have been in such a wonderful and excited mood! Yes, I’m generally always in a good mood bc I don’t have the space for miserable. Sorry. I discovered a long time ago that your attitude, your perception, and your reaction are all your choices and I choose positive! Anyways, when the holiday season ushers in I find myself that much more excited! With all the happiness and holiday cheer in the air I got to thinking about what exactly about the holiday season makes me so happy and why has the holiday season in recent years become better and better??  Simple answer:  family, friends, fun, love, loyalty and purpose.  That's what it boils down to.  I love my family and I love my friends and it makes me happy to see them happy and spend time with them.  They can irritate you and frustrate you, but at the end of the day they are what you have.  Not to mention, a complete stranger can cause the same level of irritation and frustration, so if it's inherent in the ordinary custom of living life, then you might as well deal with the irritation that comes from those you love the most.  As I've gotten older I've found it's easier to deal with the disappointment and frustration that sometimes comes out of relationships with the people you love.  Everything is not always that serious or worthy of a knockdown drag out fight and complete falling out.  Agree to disagree or learn to deal differently.  Often times a simple time out or moderation in  the type of interaction you choose to have with certain family members or friends who regularly push your buttons is all that it takes.  My oldest sister, for example, use to drive me crazy on a regular basis.  We would go hard in love for a good 2 months and then she would instantly start tripping and I'd be on the verge of wanting to smash her face in (yes, I'm being dramatic but you get it).  The more she would go through these emotions the more I would get pissed.  Then about a year and a half ago I decided that I was partially responsible for her behavior because I would go through the same things with her knowing the likely conclusion.  I just stopped dealing with her the same way but I didn't hold on to any resentment or frustration  b/c it didn't make or break me and b/c she is my sister and I love her.  I started dealing with her at a distance but I loved her just the same, except for there was more peace and more love.  We could get together for the holidays and play games, eat good food, watch funny movies and love and laugh and enjoy one another without any issues or expectations, except for the expectation of love and loyalty.  When I hear stories about people who were the best of friends for decades or family members who say they haven't spoke in years or are no longer friends but instead enemies over nothingness it's sort of mind blowing.  I couldn't imagine not speaking to my family never ever?? Now, there are a few old friends that are no longer friends of mine b/c of significant issues (note, there is a difference between significant and insignificant) but there is no beef or animosity from me, and that includes the ones that literally crossed me.  I just made a conscious decision that certain people have a different idea of what friendship means than what I do and therefore, we were no longer compatible. There's no controversy in that.  They may have some conflict but I most certainly don't.  I just have found that the holidays are the times when you get to share a little extra love, well planned gifts, and better memories!  Why would you want to be in a negative space or so emotionally far away from people you love during a time like that??     




More pics and discussion after the break>>>>

Random Ranting About Real Life Things

The beginning of my packing efforts:
My absolute treasured DVF luggage
bag, gifted from my BFF for my bday
last year; my grey pointy toe wedges;
my sequins jacket blazer...just in case.

I don't have a particular message or theme tonight because I'm totally pooped and it takes some real energy, thought and words to go into what I post for you honeeyz!!! I don't want to take the milk out of the honeey so I won't wing it with a poorly written topic.  Unfortunately, I have to get up really early tomorrow so I can get off of work early and travel to 2hrs to DE to pick up my Princess (the Young Money son of mine isn't coming...he has better things to do with his popular life, like a school dance or something).  I need to get off this darn computer and turn off X-Factor (still hugely pissed that Drew got voted off but can't get enough of that cute little Rachel and blown away by Melanie every episode so still watching) so I can run up to the gym and get a decent workout in, come back and finish packing for the weekend before I shut it down!  I have a couple of fun things planned this weekend, including shopping for me, shopping for Christmas gifts, attending a Christmas party, and most importantly (of course, aside from movie time and love fest with my Princess) is seeing my BFF, Shan!!!! We just have wayyyyy too much fun together. I'm cracking up typing this just thinking about the fun we have.  All of that fun, working, shopping, and traveling is gonna require a lot of preparation!  I'll be gone for the weekend and for whatever reason my blogger account will not allow me to post and update from my iPhone (notice the specific distinction from a phone...umm Apple lover over here).  Isn't that like some sort of civil violation or something? If not, it should be.  In addition to that civil violation, my mother doesn't have internet service and that's where I'll be staying for the weekend.  I think her lack of internet service is surely a criminal violation. With all that being said, this is likely my last post for the week so I'm gonna leave you honeeyz with a list of things on my mind and a list of topics I plan to cover next week and beyond:

Things in my little brain:

1) What the heck am I gonna wear to the holiday get together?
2) Why did I throw away my Christmas decorations upon moving to DC? Why did I throw away half of my house and belongings in lieu of actually packing like normal people?? 
3) I love my shih tzu baby, Benjamin, but he is pissing me off beyond description with his poop places I know I shouldn't be pooping shenanigans. Therefore, he is really asking for a spot on craigslist!
4) I swear if Rachel or Melanie go home from X-Factor tonight I will likely stop watching!
5) Why can't I just be skinny and eat what I want?? Why do I gotta go upstairs and work out to try to get skinny before my birthday in April??
6) I'm hungry!
7) I gotta make some dieting and exercising changes b/c I'm still at the same place!

Topics I will be covering in the days to come:

1) "Malimony?"-women paying men alimony!! Uh yea, it's happening in record numbers these day!
2) The God ugly truth about divorce... SMH. Sweet Baby Jesus help us all. 
3) Hustling....homie!! I gets my hustle on!! :-) 
4) Heels, heels, heels... do I really need a pair of flats?  I certainly don't want none!
5) Style icons...um whose your icon? I know who mine is (for now). 
6) Financially hawwwtttt... How to get your credit score to match your shoe game

Well honeeyz, those are the things in my little brain right now and the topics I will have something to say about soon.  Feel free to send me suggestions of things on your mind, guest blog with me, send pics of your WORKing it outfit or whatever you got going on, comment on all the posts here, share the blog with others, etcsssssss.... But more importantly enjoy your weekend honeeyz! I will. MUAH! xoxox