Styling: On the CrazySexyCool Tip!

CrazySexyCool-ing!!

Not only is CrazySexyCool one of my absolute favorite albums of all time (Ummm who can get enough of "Red Light Special," "Creep" or "Diggin' on You"???) but it's sort of one of my reoccurring dress styles too.  I can go from real extra and over the top which often includes fur, pony hair, animal prints, designer everything, loud colors, multiple textures in one single piece, mixed patterns, unusual cuts and all the drama I can find.  Then in the blink of an eye, I'm sophisticated chic with clean, straight lines; black, grey, navy and muted tones and traditional, basic pieces.  And then there's the CrazySexyCool, which is really kinda my personal substitute for what some people call casual or thrown together looks.  I can't do complete casual (I already told you before that my feet are allergic to flats, that no one should own sweats of any kind for any reason, parenting is not an excuse for lack of style or effort and so forth) but the fact of the matter is that I have a busy life, I do a lot of traveling up and down the road, and I have two demanding children who are involved in a number of activities that require more running around so I can't be over the top crazy ALL the time.  Very unfortunate, yes I know.  So in order to marry those two worlds (an inability to do boring casual and a necessity to be comfortable and flexible at times) I often defer to a casual chic type styles.  This generally consists of blazers with skinny jeans, cargo pants with sweaters, over the knee boots,  leggings and oversized tops with a belt, wedges, booties, and the likes.  Relaxed and easy but pulled together and stylish.

Here is what I wore this past Friday hanging out with my kiddies, going to the movie theaters, running the streets in preparation for Christmas... kinda CrazySexyCool! What are you honeeyz go to favorites for relaxed, chic, casual-like, CrazySexyCool gear?? Please share!! I have:

Sorry for the picture quality.  I'm going to have to swipe my son's digital camera b/c

the good old trusty iPhone camera isn't cutting it lately. Anyways, this outfit consists

of an oversized charcoal grey, tweed short sleeved double breasted BCBG blazer.  

The pants are a maroon distressed skinny jean also by BCBG.  

 More Pics and a little TLC after the break! Click below for the additions>>>>

Nailed It Again!!!

A few weeks ago...

As most of you honeeyz know, my manicures are one of my favorite accessories and also 1 of 25 "you look like a million bucks must haves."  I love to have fun with my nails and do something funky from time to time to keep things exciting!  Like many women, OPI brand is one of my favorite brands because it not only boasts great quality, but it has one of the most extensive lines in terms of color selection and designs.  But even still, I have to say I prefer Essie brand above all.  The only issue with Essie, which is actually made by OPI, is that it doesn't have as much of an extensive color selection but their quality far surpasses OPI.  They are a little more sophisticated and conservative with their colors but no one does a muted, or matte, or dark polish like Essie! I love it! And with age, I honestly prefer the more sophisticated colors that aren't as loud and ghetto fabulous as others.  What I absolutely can NOT do is the cheap corner store brands b/c as far as I'm concerned you can definitely tell the difference in the finish.  My manicurist tends to disagree with this theory and she sometimes tries to convince me to just grab any brand provided it has a color that I like. I never do. I can't. She says that it is more about the color than the brand of the polish that dictates the finish.  Again, I disagree.  At my hair salon, Bliss Elements, they carry CND's shellac polish in addition to OPI in their nail bar.  Shellac and other nail gel polishes (Axxium by OPI, Gelaxy, Nexium, Gelish, etc) are all the rage as of late.  Gel nail colors are intended to last longer, usually up to 2 weeks without chipping.  Many people love them but some complain that some brands don't last as long as they say and some people complain that it takes too much time and process and product to get the gel off.  I actually use a crystal acrylic overlay on my nails because I gnaw them down to nothingness when in their natural state.  The crystal overlay is followed by my polish choice and then a gel coat.  Crystal is less harsh and potent than straight acrylic.  It also looks way more natural on top of the nails, like a true overlay rather than artificial nails, which I really don't like.  The crystal overlay is a little more expensive but well worth it.  Anyways,  here are a few of my designs and color choices of  recent months.  I'll try to keep you honeeyz and guys updated with my nail fun and different designs and ideas I come across in my researching and perusing of sites, magazines, and other people's fingers (lol).   I hope you are willing to share your nail and manicure creativity with the rest of us honeeyz!!! We need ideas and collaboration!!!

Click below for more nail pictures!

Back to the Regularly Scheduled Program...but Better!

Hello honeeyz!!!!

I miss you guys tremondously.  It's been 2 whole weeks since we last chatted and I so apologize for the delay.  This thing called life grabbed a hold of me and shook me nearly half to death over these past two weeks.  My goodness! I'll try my best to not allow that to happen again, or at least fight back and try to get a post or two in during the beating.  The reality is that I, like most Power Chicks, but unlike many successful celebrity bloggers, don't have the luxury of time to blog full-time without managing a "real" job that pays me so that I can pay all the bills, but Lord knows I'd love for that opportunity to grace me in the very near future.  Anyways, I've been balancing the Christmas holiday coming and going over the past few weeks, but I also have been working like a straight up crazy person....15hour days and nearly 70hours per week has been pretty typical for me. While it's looking like this grueling schedule will persist, I promise to do a better job of making sure you honeeyz and guys get your nutrients here at Milk and Honeeyz.  But there's some good news yet... although I haven't had the luxury to rant and rave on a daily basis, it has definitely been on my mind and in my head and I have several drafted posts, memos on my iPhone, notes scribbled on my notepad, points jotted in my iPad, and drafts via email in my inbox so I have enough material to get us back on track and keep us going! 

First up, it's only fitting to address the next impending event....New Years!  There are two things that come to mind immediately when I think of this holiday, Goals and Celebrating! However, It seems that some are trying to create a new trend (or at least I've seen it on Facebook quite often and it makes me smh and laugh every time), which is to denounce resolutions and say they are doing something better than that.  I'd love to know exactly what that is b/c any fool should know that walking around without goals, desires, plans, dreams, particularly unwritten, is why they are a fool instead of an accomplished and motivated individual.  I'm no fool so I happily set resolutions every year, most of which I keep and make a good faith effort in accomplishing.  Some fall by the wayside or get reworked in time but I always have a plan and I always go down my list checking things off and I always evaluate my progress before the end of the year.  There is nothing like starting a brand new year off with a brand new mind frame, regardless of how well or how poorly the preceeding year was.  If you put 20 progressive and beneficial things on your list but only half stick, you are 50% better off than you were last year rather than not b/c you were too busy pretending like you are above setting resolutions.  

More ranting and raving, a list of my goals for 2012 and pics from Christmas after the break>>>

You Better WORK It Honeey!! Casual Fridays

This past "Casual Friday." I incorporated a few of
some of the essential pieces I've previously discussed.
More importantly I was looking cute & professional!

Most employers have gotten with the program and implemented a Dress Down Friday, Casual Friday, Denim Friday or similar policy in the work force. I’m guessing this was done as an added incentive to get us to drag our butts into work on a Friday knowing full well we'd rather just call out sick. Well that’s what I’m assuming is the purpose of the policy, why else are you allowing me to come into work with my street clothes on?? Anyways, I actually enjoy dressing professional for work or the challenge of being presentable in a more formal environment while maintaining some of my style. First of all, I think it’s so much easier to throw on a dress or a pair of slacks with a button up shirt than it is to put together an entire outfit (I puts work into what I'm wearing!).  Second of all and most importantly, I went to school for 7 years; spent $100k on the cost of my higher education; and exhausted countless hours studying, while entertaining a crying baby (usually that was Cierra, as Brycen didn’t cry, he terrorized instead) and holding down my household so that I can finally get into the position where I had a respectable career that paid the bills (namely paid the student loan bill that paid for the cost of higher education..very circular situation that plagues the best of us) and would give me license to wear a professional little outfit.  After all that torture, expense and time, I often want to wear something that’s different than what I wear in my everyday life, if not for anything else but to distinguish the environment that I slaved away to get to versus the more relaxed social life that required little to nothing to play around in! But even still, a dress down day doesn't hurt nobody!! 

But there are a couple of rules to this.  Too often, you see people totally forgetting that while they have the green light to dress a little more relaxed for the day, totally blowing it and forgetting that they are still at work and there is a certain expectation.  It blows my mind when I see people prancing around at work looking like who done it and why? It is down right embarrassing so for the love of Christ, I've decided to put a list of DON'TS together so some people can stop making the same mistakes at work and thinking it's ok because it's Friday...um no boo boo; it's not ok!!!

DON'T:

1) Ripped jeans, bleached jeans, stained jeans, camel toe jeans, and the likes... I hope and pray no one is expecting me to explain why!!! Just don't do it. Please. When in doubt, women should try a dark washed trouser cut jean, any style including even a ankle/skinny black jean.  Men can go with any style jean provided they aren't the pair they wear when doing construction or painting around the house.  Add a blazer and a shoe and you are likely just as professional than someone with a pair of slacks on.  

2) Sweats.  Honestly, sweats outside of the gym is almost always a DON'T so to think it's ok to wear them to work is really outside of my comprehension.

3) Sneakers.  Again, it's work... not the park, not the gym, not the basketball court!!  You may want to be casual and relaxed and this can be done with a shoe.  For women there are great alternative shoes that give you comfort but style and professionalism, such as the cute little flats that everyone is wearing (not me, as my feet are allergic to flats and can only function in heels), wedges, riding boots (these, I will indulge even though they are generally flat...for some reason my feet has accepted these, I believe bc they are in trend now...yes, that's why), or wedges. I honestly pair the same shoes I wear with my business work attire with jeans.  The only shoe exception to dress down Friday is that  I can often wear a funkier shoe that I wouldn't normally wear with my business casual attire.  For men, also take a classic shoe you wear with slacks and suits and just pair them with your jeans.  There are also a lot of brands that make versatile shoes that can go from professional to casual usually with a rubber sole.  Some of my favorite labels for men that are notorious for a versatile shoe include Cole Haan, Prada, Gucci, Ralph Lauren and Puma Black Label.

4) Spandex.  Sighhhhhh.  I honestly see women in these way too regularly and unless you are really careful this is generally a recipe for disaster. You have to be very cautious of what you put on top to totally pull this off.  I would say err on the side of caution and just save it for another day.  There are some similar slim fitting pants that can work but it should be more of a pant than simply a pair of leggings.  Zara, Ralph Lauren, and a few other labels have some super cute riding pants that I have to have!!  You still get the whole legging effect but the material is usually thicker, there is usually added details of buttons, suede patches, piping, pockets, and/or stitching that help to separate this pant from the usual spandex legging.  

5) Baseball caps. Yes, people are literally showing up to work with baseball caps on and keeping them there as part of their outfit.  It's just inappropriate from beginning to end.  And when women do this (black women do this a lot in my building, unfortunately) it is beyond ridiculous b/c the natural conclusion is this fool has translated Casual Friday to mean Don't Do My Hair Friday and I can't even begin to tell you how absurd that is.  Do your darn hair everyday! Care about your appearance and the energy you are putting out there! Good Lord! 

MORE TIPS, PICS AND COMMENTARY (AKA RANTING) AFTER THE BREAK>>>

Holiday Cheer Without the Controversy!

Me and two of my besties and family
holiday party having a good old time!

With the impending Christmas holiday and the past Thanksgiving holiday, I have been in such a wonderful and excited mood! Yes, I’m generally always in a good mood bc I don’t have the space for miserable. Sorry. I discovered a long time ago that your attitude, your perception, and your reaction are all your choices and I choose positive! Anyways, when the holiday season ushers in I find myself that much more excited! With all the happiness and holiday cheer in the air I got to thinking about what exactly about the holiday season makes me so happy and why has the holiday season in recent years become better and better??  Simple answer:  family, friends, fun, love, loyalty and purpose.  That's what it boils down to.  I love my family and I love my friends and it makes me happy to see them happy and spend time with them.  They can irritate you and frustrate you, but at the end of the day they are what you have.  Not to mention, a complete stranger can cause the same level of irritation and frustration, so if it's inherent in the ordinary custom of living life, then you might as well deal with the irritation that comes from those you love the most.  As I've gotten older I've found it's easier to deal with the disappointment and frustration that sometimes comes out of relationships with the people you love.  Everything is not always that serious or worthy of a knockdown drag out fight and complete falling out.  Agree to disagree or learn to deal differently.  Often times a simple time out or moderation in  the type of interaction you choose to have with certain family members or friends who regularly push your buttons is all that it takes.  My oldest sister, for example, use to drive me crazy on a regular basis.  We would go hard in love for a good 2 months and then she would instantly start tripping and I'd be on the verge of wanting to smash her face in (yes, I'm being dramatic but you get it).  The more she would go through these emotions the more I would get pissed.  Then about a year and a half ago I decided that I was partially responsible for her behavior because I would go through the same things with her knowing the likely conclusion.  I just stopped dealing with her the same way but I didn't hold on to any resentment or frustration  b/c it didn't make or break me and b/c she is my sister and I love her.  I started dealing with her at a distance but I loved her just the same, except for there was more peace and more love.  We could get together for the holidays and play games, eat good food, watch funny movies and love and laugh and enjoy one another without any issues or expectations, except for the expectation of love and loyalty.  When I hear stories about people who were the best of friends for decades or family members who say they haven't spoke in years or are no longer friends but instead enemies over nothingness it's sort of mind blowing.  I couldn't imagine not speaking to my family never ever?? Now, there are a few old friends that are no longer friends of mine b/c of significant issues (note, there is a difference between significant and insignificant) but there is no beef or animosity from me, and that includes the ones that literally crossed me.  I just made a conscious decision that certain people have a different idea of what friendship means than what I do and therefore, we were no longer compatible. There's no controversy in that.  They may have some conflict but I most certainly don't.  I just have found that the holidays are the times when you get to share a little extra love, well planned gifts, and better memories!  Why would you want to be in a negative space or so emotionally far away from people you love during a time like that??     




More pics and discussion after the break>>>>

Random Ranting About Real Life Things

The beginning of my packing efforts:
My absolute treasured DVF luggage
bag, gifted from my BFF for my bday
last year; my grey pointy toe wedges;
my sequins jacket blazer...just in case.

I don't have a particular message or theme tonight because I'm totally pooped and it takes some real energy, thought and words to go into what I post for you honeeyz!!! I don't want to take the milk out of the honeey so I won't wing it with a poorly written topic.  Unfortunately, I have to get up really early tomorrow so I can get off of work early and travel to 2hrs to DE to pick up my Princess (the Young Money son of mine isn't coming...he has better things to do with his popular life, like a school dance or something).  I need to get off this darn computer and turn off X-Factor (still hugely pissed that Drew got voted off but can't get enough of that cute little Rachel and blown away by Melanie every episode so still watching) so I can run up to the gym and get a decent workout in, come back and finish packing for the weekend before I shut it down!  I have a couple of fun things planned this weekend, including shopping for me, shopping for Christmas gifts, attending a Christmas party, and most importantly (of course, aside from movie time and love fest with my Princess) is seeing my BFF, Shan!!!! We just have wayyyyy too much fun together. I'm cracking up typing this just thinking about the fun we have.  All of that fun, working, shopping, and traveling is gonna require a lot of preparation!  I'll be gone for the weekend and for whatever reason my blogger account will not allow me to post and update from my iPhone (notice the specific distinction from a phone...umm Apple lover over here).  Isn't that like some sort of civil violation or something? If not, it should be.  In addition to that civil violation, my mother doesn't have internet service and that's where I'll be staying for the weekend.  I think her lack of internet service is surely a criminal violation. With all that being said, this is likely my last post for the week so I'm gonna leave you honeeyz with a list of things on my mind and a list of topics I plan to cover next week and beyond:

Things in my little brain:

1) What the heck am I gonna wear to the holiday get together?
2) Why did I throw away my Christmas decorations upon moving to DC? Why did I throw away half of my house and belongings in lieu of actually packing like normal people?? 
3) I love my shih tzu baby, Benjamin, but he is pissing me off beyond description with his poop places I know I shouldn't be pooping shenanigans. Therefore, he is really asking for a spot on craigslist!
4) I swear if Rachel or Melanie go home from X-Factor tonight I will likely stop watching!
5) Why can't I just be skinny and eat what I want?? Why do I gotta go upstairs and work out to try to get skinny before my birthday in April??
6) I'm hungry!
7) I gotta make some dieting and exercising changes b/c I'm still at the same place!

Topics I will be covering in the days to come:

1) "Malimony?"-women paying men alimony!! Uh yea, it's happening in record numbers these day!
2) The God ugly truth about divorce... SMH. Sweet Baby Jesus help us all. 
3) Hustling....homie!! I gets my hustle on!! :-) 
4) Heels, heels, heels... do I really need a pair of flats?  I certainly don't want none!
5) Style icons...um whose your icon? I know who mine is (for now). 
6) Financially hawwwtttt... How to get your credit score to match your shoe game

Well honeeyz, those are the things in my little brain right now and the topics I will have something to say about soon.  Feel free to send me suggestions of things on your mind, guest blog with me, send pics of your WORKing it outfit or whatever you got going on, comment on all the posts here, share the blog with others, etcsssssss.... But more importantly enjoy your weekend honeeyz! I will. MUAH! xoxox

The Natural Hair Revolution: Where Do You Fit In?

This is gonna be a nice long post but here goes.... Unless you live under a rock or have been on extended vacation on the planet Jupiter, you would know or at least should know (please be aware that legal culpability applies in most instances when ya should've known even when you didn't actually know...pay attention people) that the natural hair movement, particularly concerning black women, is on an all time high and is exploding all over the place! Black women are foregoing chemicals, mostly the creamy crack (relaxers), running away from flat irons, hot combs, blow dryers and opting for more naturally curly styles, and chopping their hair off for a "fresh" start clean and clear of chemical products.  They are swapping a lot of the old school hair products for alternative products with less chemical and bad stuff (such as, sulphates, proteins, certain oils and things like that...you gotta do your own research to get all the specifics b/c I'm not entirely up on the dos and do nots but I will provide some really helpful resources at the end of this post); and they are adding homemade and natural products into their regime (this I know a little more about b/c I have done a little bit of this on my own and in doing so I have done way more research in this area).  Women of this movement are on a roll all across America and all over the world wide web! In it's current form it's like a civil war.  It's like they are angry with the stereotypes of what black hair is supposed to look like and be like and they are fighting it by rebelling and doing their own thing.  I'm just wondering is this just a fad? A phase in black hair, again? Is this really a revolution or just a style of the moment?? When the smoke all clears and the dust all settles, where are we going to really be at with our hair?

In the beginning of my
journey... chemical free!!

My hair and I have had a very special relationship for as long as I can member.  We have been through every color in the rainbow (I've had platinum blonde hair, hot pink hair, orange hair, and so forth), every texture on the texture wheel, just about all lengths possible and every single style that could be conceived or perceived! After all of this excitement, the ups and down, and a series of traumatic events, I finally decided, with the instruction of my primary doctor and the support of my BFF, Shan, to stop relaxing my hair in early 2008.  Four years later, it is still the best decision I have ever made for my hair and esteem and this is the most comfortable and satisfied I have ever been with my hair ever!!  I would be lying if I said I was less than convinced that this whole natural thing was gonna work for me when I ultimately stopped relaxing it.  I can remember telling my BFF that my hair wasn't the kind that could go perm free! I always felt like when I was overdue for a perm my hair would start to break off worse than it would with a chemical.  It would get so coarse and unruly I would get the perm just to make it behave and not so much for it to be straight.  But I was very quickly proven wrong early on in the transition.  First, I wanted a short sexy hair cut anyway.  I was sick of being married to hair and I preferred a hot hair cut (duh, Halle Berry; Malinda Williams and Nia Long has that kinda affect on a honeey!!)  to a boring long weave any day so that kinda made my transition that much easier.  I didn't have any desire to keep my length so no hesitation there but at the same time I got the benefit of not only ceasing the use of a relaxer but also cutting out the majority of any relaxer I had on my head.  Although there was a concern that it would be more complicated to keep my hair straight while natural at such a short length, but that too, with the magic hands of my stylist, Michael Flagg at Bliss Elements, became the least of my worries. With the right conditioner, products, tools, and his skills the condition of my hair and the manageability of my hair, whether straight or curly, has never been better. And with time it just got better...it's even more trained and responsive.  I could workout like crazy and sweat it up, I could get caught in the rain and humidity and easily wrap it up quickly and it rebounds nicely.  After wearing my hair cute and short for three years, I decided to start the grow out process last year and I'm now at the boring pain in the @ss medium stage and feeling antsy and stuck! It's not growing fast enough for me. But my stylist says I need to be patient and I need to just chill out b/c it's growing and more importantly it's not coming out or breaking off.  True. Guess I should chill and wait....

Grow out phase! Curled tight.

When I started my journey it was about the health of my hair and scalp and also about freedom and autonomy.  I love my hair and I think it's important to keep it done (honeeyz please don't slack on the hair...there is no excuse not to love yourself enough to care about your hair), but I was sick of being a slave to it.  And for me, the perm (relaxer) was the ball and chain scenario because it was such a process and such a laboring event and just about everything had to be scheduled around it...it was more annoying than it was good.  I know there is that constant bickering about whether or not you are more black in the "natural state," whether you're really natural if you wear your chemically free hair straight, or whether adding color makes you not natural, or if using non-natural products in your chemically free hair is not natural, or whatever other back and forth nonsense that is going on out there.  But none of that mattered or matters to me.  The truth is I don't feel any more black now relaxer free for 4 years and I didn't feel any less black before with a chemical or even with weave... all of those choices were more about styling, habit, miseducation and preference; and not about race or cultural identity so those arguments don't make much sense to me.  And in fact, I find when you set up these kinda of rules... must use only natural products, must only wear hair in the curly style, can never use heat ever never on my hair... and then live by them as absolutes just because you set them, you ultimately put yourself in the same slave like mentality as when you felt like you must have this silky straight texture, you must have this certain type of length, you must fry your hair straight to be pretty, you must have a perm every 6-8weeks.  No different.  Same mentality but just from one end to the other.  My journey was about not being dependent on some thing that was deteriorating my health and wrecking my flow.  When I let that "need" to have a chemical smacked up in my head I achieved exactly what I set out to do! On top of that, the confidence and the carefree-ness that came along with it was totally liberating and allowed for my artsy self to shine through.  I still enjoy my hair straight and wear it like this the majority of the time, although I actually don't use much heat to achieve this.  I go to the hair salon 2x per month to have my hair conditioned, blown out and flat ironed.  In between that I don't add any more heat or use the flat iron myself.  And I recently had a sewn-in weave in my hair to give it a little bit of a different style and help me through my impatient grow out phase.  But I'm chemically free and intend to stay that way.  Glorrrryyyyyy to the good Lord Jesus!

MORE PICS, TIPS and RANTING after the break>>>>

You Better WORK It Honeey!

Yesterday was a typical Monday....running late for work, not wanting to go at all, feeling sluggish and unmotivated from the top of the morning to the end of the night! Typical.  My dress attire sort of complimented that whole typical Monday mood...casual, not too elaborate or thought out (remember I'm running late for work so there is no time for thought).  But being casual or easy breezy doesn't mean you have to go to work looking a hot mess or without any good sense (and yes, when I see good sense I'm talking fashion sense). For yesterday's Monday I grabbed a simple pair of navy blue boot cut trouser pants and a asymmetric cut floral printed cardigan that I wore as a blouse rather than an overlay cardigan.  The floral print is not typical me...I really don't do sweet, lovely, innocent ... that is the absolute opposite of who I am! LOL.  But I'm definitely into prints this season and I loved the colors and the cut of the sweater.  I added a thicker more rustic belt to pare down the pretty, little flowers and make it more me (mean, little thorns)! I think I WORKed it Honeeyzzzzzzz!

Tip: Patterns and colors can be your accessory or as I would say, "the honey in your tea," so when shopping for basics don't really grab just a plain old basic but a basic with a twist... button up in a bright color, sweater with a bias cut or some asymmetry, a class pencil skirt with a pattern, etc...  You'll be pleasantly surprised with how a simple twist can turn your typical sluggish, unmotivated Monday mood into a stylish, fun, spunky Monday without even trying and despite the desire to want to crawl back into the weekend past. What types of things do you Honeeyz gravitate towards to get through a typical Monday and put you in a WORKing it mood, despite of!!!??

more pics after the break>>>>>>

Dating Chronicles: "Speed Dating"

The man I've been dating for the past 3 months
(in my deepest, darkest, most vivid fantasy)! LOL!
Picture courtesy on bottom left... (basically I
swiped this pic while stalking his Twitter page).
Lazzzzzzz!!!! Where are you? Save me love! Please!

This will be sort of like a roll call of men that I've encountered over the past few months while I was on blogging vacation.  Some of them I went on a date or two with, some I totally ignored, some are still hanging around by a thread, and some think we dated but failed to run that by me for approval (ummm no, Johnny I'm not in a relationship with you??).  With that, let me bring you honeeyz up to speed so you know what I've endured experienced as of late.  In the future, I'll try to post regularly what happens in my dating life as it unfolds.  But to be truthful, I'm avoiding the whole dating thing like the plague as of lately but trust me, you will not be bored b/c the things I go through and the fools I meet are worthy of a blog on its own.  So enjoy... on me! 

I've never had any issues getting a decent amount of play (I'm not bragging; I'm just saying).  It doesn't matter where I'm at or what I'm looking like (sweaty in the gym with hair tied back; in the grocery store with PJs on; etc), there is always some man or men that have something to say (it's usually something stupid and unworthy but they always got something to say).  My kids are witnesses, particularly Princess Cierra, who acts like my personal security when it comes to men...watching and scowling and barking at the men before they get a chance to say much of anything.  Anyways, here is a speedy rendition of a few of the "shining stars" in the bunch...(SIGHH):

Bachelor #1: The Little Boys -- I don't know what is going on as of late, but all the little boys want to come out and play??  I will say this here and now, I don't like guys younger than me.  I prefer a more seasoned MAN... 35 and up.  But bc my BFFs say I'm being too picky and dramatic in my dating life, I try to open my horizons and in came a slew of little kids.  There is the 28-year-old pharmacist and the 26-year-old medical student who are in rotation off and on right now.  Both are clearly educated and mature, but I swear when they start giggling at their own goofy little jokes it is difficult for me to endure.  So at this moment I'm dodging and avoiding both of them b/c I can only take them in small doses... the whole daycare thing is just hard for me!! My son is 15-years-old and I can barely deal with him on a regular basis so well you know.... I'm not saying all younger guys are problematic but you have to be prepared to endure those moments, big or small, when the gigantic child comes out of them. Sometimes its fun b/c with youthfulness comes spontaneity and adventure but at times it can be a bit much.  Proceed with caution!!
More bachelor categories after the break......

My New Get it Right & Tight Tool

I love, love, love getting new items in the mail and today is no different!  I recently ordered a digital, glass, weight scale from overstock.com and it arrived today!!  Please don't sleep on overstock honeeyz!! I've ordered quite a few things from them for the home over the past few years and they are some of my favorite items to date. They have great prices, quick delivery, little to no shipping costs, and a variety of items to choose from. Ok, enough of the free advertisement ...  I know I recently mentioned in a prior post on healthy lifestyle habits that one of the things to avoid is becoming a slave to the scale, meaning not weighing yourself every 5 seconds or relying exclusively on the scale during your weight loss and healthy living journey.  However, it is important to be aware of your general weight and even check your progress during your journey.  With that said, a good scale is definitely useful.  Self control and discipline with it is even more useful (remember no relying and obsessing over weight)!

I haven't had a scale in years because I haven't been lucky enough to find one that is not only reliable but cute enough to be out on display in the bathroom. I certainly can't be having no ugly looking scale wrecking my bathroom decor!!  Unfortunately, the fancy, cute ones I did come across cost way too much money.  However, I could no longer endure the occasional, yet persistent, traumatization of my mother's scale that is so inaccurate it should be criminal!  Thankfully, one of my coworkers who has been doing an excellent job getting in shape and developing a healthier lifestyle let me know about this scale she ordered from overstock.  I immediately went online, checked out the reviews, admired the look and made the purchase! It was only $29.95, free shipping, and was delivered in 2 days! Doesn't get much better!

more ranting and raving after the break.....

$25 and 10 minutes to 1 million bucks!!

There's a lot here but only a few that
I absolutely need to have to survive!

The saying goes, "you look like a million bucks!" but what some of you may not realize is that it doesn't have to be literal.  Meaning, you don't have to spend an arm and two legs to illicit that kind of response.  The reality is that the modern day Power Chick (moi) gets up and goes to work, maintains a household, raises a family, has a side hustle, and spends any down time plotting and planning with her fellow Power Chick about ways to elevate to the next level.  Therefore, we don't have a lot of time or unlimited resources to sacrifice on trying to look like a million bucks all the time. Besides, its the simple things that create the most effortless, chic and pulled together looks.  Now don't get me wrong.  I have a bad habit of spending money and I do like nice things, but I learned a long time ago that you can't buy style, class, or confidence!  So it's not so much about the label or the price tag or the volume, but more so about the way you put a look together and carry it.  Sometimes I can spend an eternity standing in my closet surrounded by a bunch of stuff and trying to put together a little something; but it's always the simpler things I feel the most comfortable and pretty in and it's always those same simple things that I generate the most "you look like a million bucks!" comments!

Out of the kindness of my heart (LOL), I've compiled a list of 10 things that I consider my must have easy ways to look pulled together and pretty without spending more than $25...

The Reality of Reality TV...UNrealistic

Reality TV has clearly exploded all over the air ways! I actually don't believe that VH1 has any regular programming that is NOT reality TV based.  Do they?? Anyways, I recently made the decision to reassess what I subject my precious eyes to. The same way we have to watch the company we keep and be mindful of what we say out of our mouth, rings true for what we allow into our home and head via what we see. For some time now I found myself becoming more uncomfortable with some of what I was consciously watching and scaled back tremendously on what I spent my time watching, but after the ridiculousness better known as Kim Kardashian and her 15 minute marriage for the sake of having a 2 hour TV wedding special and the cover of People magazine, I was done! It's bad enough that she's rich and famous for doing absolutely nothing but I was beyond disgusted with the amount of money paid to have this wedding and the amount of money generated by broadcasting the nonsense.  Meanwhile, our country is in an economic crisis, our little boys are being sexually molested by football coaches and catholic school priests, and our young military is being picked off one by one fighting a war that I'm still not sure of who, what or why.  In short, there are real issues going on in the world so for any human being to be that ridiculously vain when they already have more money and attention than they could ever be worthy of really irked me.  I promptly deleted the entire Kardashian clan from my DVR, twitter account (yea I have a twitter and I don't know what the heck to do with it), people to watch list, etc.  I'm not supporting trash like that or exposing myself to that type of influence.  And with the single swipe of an entire family, I started reevaluating my entire TV roster.

 Continue reading for the rest of my rant....

You Better WORK It Honeey!

Me at work: festive, bright and chic!
Check out the guy checking me out
in the background.....lol!!!!!

"You Better WORK It Honeey" is a section of M & H that will be dedicated to showcasing work style and fashion.  As my honeeyz know or now know (I've said it a trillion times and will say it a trillion more times on this blog), I love the art of fashion and using individual style as a way of expression and just living (what the heck is life without shoes, bags and dresses?? I don't even want to know!)! Obviously, day to day style usually differs from that of work or professional style and since I'm a grown up now (can ya believe I got the nerve to be 33???) and I'm a "professional" (allegedly...lol) and spend the majority of my waking hours at work, I thought it would be a great idea to see how I (and the rest of you honeeyz) put it down in the professional realm! Although I'm an attorney and that can be one of the most uptight professions (stuffy suits, black, grey and navy only attire, with measly 3inch pumps....I threw up a little in my mouth writing that out), I lucked up and secured an attorney position with the Federal Government.  Rumor proved true that the Feds is one of the most relaxed working environment, well some agencies are and the agency I work for happens to be one.  Yaaay me! Anyway, there is obviously a time and place for everything and you do need to dress according to the environment, occasions and company but you don't have to be boring and sacrifice all sense of style and expression; especially, when you work somewhere that affords you the luxury of a flexible dress code.  My goal with this section is to get you guys to share with M&H your work style so we can post it here and exchange ideas of how to shake up the corporate world!
.... more pic and commentary after the break >>>

Survival of the Fittest Chick...in 10 Steps

April 2011

I mentioned in my reintroduction post that I'm in pursuit of losing weight but allow me to elaborate and clarify.  A better description of this pursuit is one of a well rounded and healthy LIFESTYLE.  It's not just about losing weight, although that is definitely part of the goal.  In the past two years I've yo yo up and down by 5-10lbs pretty consistently and last year (see the attached bathing suit shots) I decided to make some real hardcore changes. I lost 9lbs and kept it off for 6 months but then I started back with some reckless habits and it slowly creeped back on.  However, I learned a lot about my body and myself in doing losing the weight, keeping it off, and then foolishly packing it back on.  I've committed to myself that that experience will be my first and last going thru something so ridiculous.  I'm not interested in spending my life doing a Janet Jackson, yo yo-ing up and down, crash diets, excessive eating, jumping from anorexic to plus sized! I'm lucky that despite having 2 children and hitting the big 3-0 a few years ago that I'd managed to stay relatively the same size give or take the usual 5-10lbs here and there, but more recently I found myself at a place I'd never been (clothes not fitting, feeling all sluggish and insecure about how I was looking).  I decided to kick into gear and I have really resolved to develop long lasting changes that create a better lifestyle for me with the benefit of losing weight, creating healthy habits, disposing of unhealthy habits, trying new things and meeting new people while doing so.  Here is a list of effective things I've incorporated over the past month that I plan to take with me forever (lifestyle vs. fad) and you can use them too:

1) I stopped talking about the issue and just started doing it.  I did some research, dug into my basic common sense, wrote out a plan, and committed myself. I stopped complaining about the gym, I haven't discussed my results or goals, and I made this new resolve strictly about me and what I needed to do. Honestly, some of my friends want me to shut up anyway b/c  they don't see any difference or realize I've gained any weight to begin with. So I'm doing us all a favor.
2) Increase, diversify, maximize and record my daily activity.  I committed myself to start out with 3-4 days per week of varied exercise, which include circuit and strength training, cardio, and new activities (kickboxing, yoga, pilates included....which I absolutely love).  I keep a calendar of what I do daily which keeps me motivated and disciplined.  At the end of the month I'm able to see where I could've been and what I need to do differently the next month. I don't allow stupid irrelevant things deter me... EX: what my hair looks like will not dictate if and when I work out.  I wrap, pincurl or pull up my hair with a satin scarf protecting it and keep it moving.  Hopefully, it survives (which it usually does), but if it doesn't that's not my priority. I do crunches, lunges, squats, arm curls, leg lifts, pushups, dips and whatever activity I can while in front of the TV watching toxic reality shows.  Every little bit helps and once you get the momentum you find yourself in a full workout just as intense as you would be in a gym setting.  I take the stairs instead of the elevator, I walk instead of drive and all those simplistic things that really do count!
3) Calorie counting. It is sooooo helpful!!  I know how much of what is going in my mouth and if it's worth it.  When you start to realize a coffee cake for a light snack is the equivalent of a full course steak dinner then it's easy to say "I don't need that!" When you start to realize an 800 calorie slice of cheesecake is the same as 2 grueling hours in the gym on the elliptical machine then it makes that decision less difficult.  You actually end up running from that cake!  If the difference between a Chipotle chicken bowl and a Chipotle chicken burrito with the exact same ingredients is 300 calories then it's easier to choose the bowl. Pay attention to what you eat and it's caloric value ...

Allow Me to Reintroduce Myself!!

Hello my loves (yes, I'm talking to allllll 3 of you and the millions out there that just haven't discovered Milk and Honeeyz YET)!!! It's been over a year since we last chatted, I know, I know. But I have been quite busy and as ashamed as I am to admit, I have not done anything that I planned to do over this past year with my blog that would warrant the "official release" that I dreamed about when I first created this blog in 2010. However, while I'm plotting, planning, strategizing, thinking and researching, time is passing and I haven't given you guys anything to long for, check for, or care about. That's so not me. I may be somewhat of a procrastinator but I always get the job done so shame on me!! I discovered in all of my planning for the ultimate blog launch, as well as the impending launch of other projects and goals that I've been working on this year, that I have to just do it!! Everything won't be perfect and I have all of my life to figure it all out. So that's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna just start posting and I'll refine and rework as I go. After all, the purpose of this blog is for me to have a platform to express myself and share my expressions with you guys and there are no rules or requirements. If I just have myself as a follower then I've done exactly what I planned to do...create a personal platform and diary for myself! So as a kickoff to really giving this a go here is a list of a few things about me and things I've been doing lately and will be chatting about:
1. I started Milk and Honeeyz to express myself and share my thoughts and ideas on all things fashion, dating, food, career, pop culture, and life in general! I'm a young hawt divorcee with 2 brilliant, cute, swagged out kids. I'm an attorney and recently relocated from Philadelphia to the DC area for work. I'm building my career, playing dress up, meeting some interesting men, finding my footing and creating an empire! Lots of fun, epiphanies, annoyances and discoveries...walk with me!
2. I'm currently working on losing 15lbs and have been doing a lot of new things to develop a more healthy and exciting lifestyle (just got in from kickboxing and I LOVE it) to accomplish before my birthday next spring...I'll keep you posted!
3. I have natural unrelaxed hair and will be celebrating my 4th year anniversary of this amazing feat.... as most of you know or will hear or find out, the natural black hair movement is really popping lately! I'll update you on what I discover and my progress in trying to grow my hair length, develop more natural curly styles (I generally wear my hair straight), and test products that help me achieve my hair goals.
4. My nails are my favorite accessories, shoes and bags are my weaknesses, I'm subscribed to every fashion magazine out there and read them through and through, Judge Judy is my absolute favorite, Sex and the City is my road map to life, I'm enjoying maturing with age, I'm passionate about many things and I really love God! You'll see! :-)